Day 11 - 9 Apr 08

If you were to ask me what one thing I can recall in my semi-awake state throughout the lectures today, that'd be this parting joke by Dr Dan Shivtan at the end of his lesson on "The Security Challenges of Israel":

One day, God decided that He has had enough of the human race. He decided that he'd end it with a flood. A REAL flood. No Noah. No Ark. He went on and summoned the leaders of the various religions in the world, to tell them the news.

"Tell your followers that in two weeks, there will be a flood and that'd be the end of all things. Now go.", He said.

The leader of the Christians returned and announced to the Christians, "In two weeks, there will be a great flood. Do not fear. Have faith and pray, and we'd meet again at the Pearly Gates."

The leader of the Muslims went back and addressed the Muslims, "In two weeks, there will be a great flood. Trust in Allah and carry out his biddings. Allah akbar!"

The leader of the Jews got back to Israel and spoke to his people, "In two weeks, there will be a great flood. We now have two weeks to learn to live underwater."

Such is the essence of the Jews. Survivors, they are.

Other quotes from Dr Shivtan include:

If you want to insult an Israeli, just tell him he's "nice".

Arab democracy. That's an oxymoron. Like good morning and military intelligence. They just do not exist.

People always tell me I'm a pessimist. I don't disagree with them. After all, what's a pessimist but a well-informed optimist.

I like this Dr Shivtan.

.........................................................................................

My daughter is speaking so much now, so suddenly, and I am missing all of it! Argh! I WANT TO GO HOME!